C: Do you know how Flo Rida got his name?
B: No, how?
C: He used to be a dental rapper!
B: ?
C: Flouride.
~*~
C: What would Garfield’s name be if he was a paper?
B: A paper? I don’t know.
C: Garfold.
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Portrait of an Awesome 9 Year Old
Scene 1:
I pick the kid up from the after school program one day. He points out some thing on the wall.
“That girl likes me.”
“Do you like her?”
He runs ahead and gets a drink of water. He looks up and grins.
“I’m being hard to get!”
“Well, that’s a good thing to be.”
“Hogan (his friend-same age) says to never make eye contact.”
“Hmm…”
Scene 2:
He is starting to really get into music and often will listen to Pandora Radio on my phone. Using headphones generally. We were meeting Daddy somewhere that I was just going to hang out in the car for a few minutes.
“Okay, leave my phone here with me.”
“I know.”
Unplugs headphones, but leaves them around his neck.
“I’m going to wear these like this because they make me look awesome!”
Scene 3:
…the following morning we’re getting ready for school. He grabs the headphones on the way out the door.
“I need these.”
“What for?”
“To wear.” (The “Duh” here is implied.)
(Also, he lasted half the day before someone told him they weren’t allowed to have those at school. She may not have known that they weren’t attached to anything, though. HIS teacher was fine with it.)
Scene 4:
Telling me some story about school goings on…
“Josh is the weirdest kid in my class. I’m second weirdest. Well, I’m tied for second place with Hogan.” Looks up and raises his arm valiantly. “I want to be weirdest!”
Scene 5:
Regarding the girl in scene 1…
“You know the girl who likes me?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, Andrew likes her. And he asked me “How do you make Maggie like you?” and I told him, “I act frickin’ awesome!”"
“Well, that is how to get people to like you, by acting awesome.”
“But she doesn’t like me anymore.”
“No?”
“Yeah, today we went in the tower and I told her that I didn’t like her and she said she didn’t anymore either. So I’m letting Andrew have her.”
*Daddy was here for this one.*
“You are, huh? That’s nice of you,” he said dryly.
“Just stepping aside?” I asked.
[Whew! Dangerous love triangle averted!]
Scene 6:
Waiting at the bus stop this morning…
“Hogan and I made a pledge. and Cayden too, but he didn’t really because he didn’t raise his right hand but I get to raise my left hand because that’s my good hand. That we wouldn’t like girls until 5th grade.”
Curtain closes on Act I
Six Word Friday: Saving
I think love is tiny acts of
saving each other again and again.
I shore you up today. Tomorrow
it’s your turn for the same.
Together we can save our selves.
Our time, our money, our sanity
One small moment at a time.
Love is boring.
I’ve been married for a while now. The thing about love is that it starts out pretty flashy and dramatic. That’s great because maybe people wouldn’t get together without these “fireworks.” We’ve seen an entire movie genre spring out of the hormonal secretions of those newly in love. Of course, only rarely do movies show the rest of the story.
What happens in the castle after Cinderella marries the Dashing prince?
Because after the honeymoon phase, people settle in to living an actual life. Which just entails…stuff. Not bad stuff, just stuff. The little daily minutiae that all added together equal a life. Even if you lead a very exciting life, there is still cooking, cleaning, working, bill paying, child raising.
You know at the beginning of the fairy tale if the hero is willing to die to save the heroine. And that’s great.
But it doesn’t really help when you are waiting in line for 3 hours at the DMV. Because I think that’s where love is.
Real, lasting love is sitting on those stupid, uncomfortable seats with you. It’s helping you dot your i’s and cross your t’s in triplicate in order to stave off another 3 hours. It’s taking turns herding the kids outside to get the wiggles out. Often, love is boring. Because life can be boring and you’ve got to love through that.
Love knows what it’s like to pace.
It will spend the wee hours of the morning walking the length of the house soothing a colicky baby. It’s in waiting rooms in hospitals everywhere.
When everything is going well and there are no hospital waiting rooms or colicky babies? Love holds your hand on the way into the grocery store. Or takes the trash out. Or makes your coffee for you.
Or sits through your favorite Dancing Show on a Monday night.
Wrong! But that’s all right.
This is not the tumor you’re looking for.
In fact, it’s not even the pseudotumor you thought it was.
Who knew that there was more than one pseudotumor? How many imposters are there?
It’s not a pseudotumor cerebri as we were told. It’s an orbital pseudotumor.
Anyway, he is responding well to treatments and feeling much better so they kicked him out last night.
We are home.
The Birthday Surprise
Couple months ago
On Thursday my husband woke up with a sore eye. Just a weird pain that he said felt like he’d pulled a muscle behind his eyelid. Since Thursday was filled with other challenges, he ignored it and carried on with the day. (It was his job on Thursday to take care of putting our dog down and also going to Grandparent’s Luncheon so our son wouldn’t be alone.)
On Friday when he awoke his eye was worse. He couldn’t open it at all and when he bent over or moved his head too fast he would feel enormous pressure in his eye. So he went over to the hospital to have it checked out.
It turns out it was a stroke.
They admitted him to run more tests and see what was going on. The MRI found a mass behind his eye and some more clots. They feel confidant that they are dissolving the other clots satisfactorily. Unfortunately, they found the mass behind his eye to be a brain tumor. They will be transferring him up to Portland to go see a specialist in this type of tumor.
Happy Birthday!
Not precisely how we’d planned on spending his 49th birthday yesterday.
Six Word Friday: Peace
Earlier in the week when I received the prompt for Six Word Friday, I knew exactly what I was going to write about. I was going to write about the protests. Non-violent protesters by the thousands, gathered to exercise their constitutional rights, demanding change in the status quo. This is going on. Right here. Right now. In our time. It’s much bigger and far more important than the mainstream (corporate) media would have you believe. https://occupywallst.org/ =where it all started and http://www.occupytogether.org/ to find a protest near you.
But, as often happens when you “know exactly,” the fates conspired to give me cause to write about something else under the topic of peace.
This is our dog named Sally.
This summer she suddenly couldn’t walk.
The vet ruled out almost everything.
The only thing left was cancer.
Only way to know for sure?
Very expensive exploratory surgery to see.
We gave her steroids. They helped.
They aren’t a long term solution.
We put it off. and off.
But the change in the weather
was too hard on her body.
Yesterday we put her down finally.
Sally was a good ol’ dog.
My mom will watch over her.
Now she can run like before.
We’ve had her for nine years.
Our son is not quite nine.
It is hard to make peace
with things of this sad nature.
Especially for the poor, little dude.
Love you, Sally. Rest in peace.
Six Word Friday: Why not?
Buy stock in kleenex. Why not?
Drink tea. Watch TV. Why not?
Have a head cold. Why not?
It’s no fun. That’s why not.
I am trying to whine not.
at least, whine not a lot.
Hunting Season Is Upon Us
So today is the first day of hunting season around here.
While I personally don’t prefer to hunt, I have always respected my husband’s right to enjoy things that I don’t, especially since I feel like he has a strong respect for the animals and isn’t only hunting trophies.
But I have to say that after last year’s hunting “adventure” as well as three separate trips back to the same location to try to retrieve our camp gear which resulted in his truck getting stuck all three times in the same non cell phone signal area thus rendering him unable to even text me that he was okay without a good hike out to a spot with a signal. I am tired of hunting and all of the accompanying drama that we have been “enjoying” of late.
Next year he hopes to go hunting with his brother. Which will ease my mind quite a bit, since we all know that we’re supposed to use the buddy system, especially out in the wilderness.
But this year…
This year, I’m pleased to say that he is (as a concession to the rest of us) going hunting with a friend and a bit more locally. Hopefully that means he will be in touch more. Of course, I won’t hold my breath.
I wish him quick success. Because the quicker we get our deer, the quicker hunting season will be over.
Banned Book Week
Today I was running around trying to get ready to go to school. We started up today. I was looking for a shirt that I like to wear, but I couldn’t find it. (In the time allotted. 
) Failing to find that shirt, I decided to wear a shirt that was my mom’s. Luckily she liked to wear baggy clothes so some things fit me. I was looking for that shirt (which is black) when I noticed a black shirt on top of a stack of shirts on the shelf in the closet. I grabbed it thinking it was the shirt I was looking for. It was not. It was a different shirt of my mom’s.
Which reminds me:
It’s Banned Books Week!
September 24 – October 1, 2011
Thanks, Mom! I would totally have forgotten. ♥
