Portrait of an Awesome 9 Year Old

Scene 1:

I pick the kid up from the after school program one day. He points out some thing on the wall.

“That girl likes  me.”

“Do you like her?”

He runs ahead and gets a drink of water. He looks  up and grins.

“I’m being hard to get!”

“Well, that’s a good thing to be.”

“Hogan (his friend-same age) says to never make eye contact.”

“Hmm…”

 

Scene 2:

He is starting to really get into music and often will listen to Pandora Radio on my phone. Using headphones generally. We were meeting Daddy somewhere that I was just going to hang out in the car for a few minutes.

“Okay, leave my phone here with me.”

“I know.”

Unplugs headphones, but leaves them around his neck.

“I’m going to wear these like this because they make me look awesome!”

 

Scene 3:

…the following morning we’re getting ready for school. He grabs the headphones on the way out the door.

“I need these.”

“What for?”

“To wear.” (The “Duh” here is implied.)

(Also, he lasted half the day before someone told him they weren’t allowed to have those at school. She may not have known that they weren’t attached to anything, though. HIS teacher was fine with it.)

 

Scene 4:

Telling me some story about school goings on…

“Josh is the weirdest kid in my class. I’m second weirdest. Well, I’m tied for second place with Hogan.” Looks up and raises his arm valiantly. “I want to be weirdest!”

Scene 5:

Regarding the girl in scene 1…

“You know the girl who likes me?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, Andrew likes her. And he asked me “How do you make Maggie like you?” and I told him, “I act frickin’ awesome!””

“Well, that is how to get people to like you, by acting awesome.”

“But she doesn’t like me anymore.”

“No?”

“Yeah, today we went in the tower and I told her that I didn’t like her and she said she didn’t anymore either. So I’m letting Andrew have her.”

*Daddy was here for this one.*

“You are, huh? That’s nice of you,” he said dryly.

“Just stepping aside?” I asked.

[Whew! Dangerous love triangle averted!]

 

Scene 6:

Waiting at the bus stop this morning…

“Hogan and I made a pledge. and Cayden too, but he didn’t really because he didn’t raise his right hand but I get to raise my left hand because that’s my good hand. That we wouldn’t like girls until 5th grade.”

Curtain closes on Act I